Be afraid. Be very afraid. Just when you thought it was OK to go out of the house, oh my, our town is about to be invaded by unimaginable horrors. Yes, it’s that time of year, Betsteroids — election season. Well, that and Halloween. Consider the parallels:

People disguised as something they may not be knock on your doors;

Said people plea for treats they wish you to give them, and depending on their doorstep street theater, said people may leave you slightly scared or somewhat amused.

Sometimes the kids are all right and the politicians not so bad either. The Betster understands the democratic process. When it works, men and women of sound character and above-average intelligence appeal for the honor of representing you at various levels of legislative government. They listen, respect your opinions, ask for ideas and make the best decisions they can make. Alaska tends to breed politicians like this, but … Well, let us just say that cynical reporters appreciate politicians on the extreme because it gives us something to write about.

And Halloween? Well, Homer has made Halloween an art. Where else do towns organize it so that we have temporary one-way streets that make trick-or-treating pedestrian friendly and kid safe? If you live in the ’Views — those downtown streets like Bayview and Mountainview that have “view” in their name — just expect a lot of visitors on Friday. The local stores have sales on ginormous bags of candy. Stock up. You’ll need it. Meanwhile, the rest of us will be pining for visitors, which is why at Chez Betster out in the boonies, we always buy quality chocolate. If some kids come by, they score. If they don’t, we’ll be eating well.

So be safe, put on the reflective tape, watch out for the little demons and enjoy life in this great town, perhaps with some of these Best Bets:

BEST HAUNTED BET: For the price of just two cans of non-perishable food you too can have your wits scared right out by the crew of the USCGC Hickory. For the weak of heart, or generally more cautious the Haunted Hickory lite starts at 4:00 p.m. The crew take the kid-gloves off at 6:00 p.m. for those who want their bejeezits scared out. 

BEST FALL CELEBRATION BET: Christian Community Church and McNeil Canyon Elementary are having parties this week. McNeil Canyon’s fall Carnival is today from 4-7 p.m., at the school. Friday, CCC has its Harvest Carnival from 5:30-7:30 p.m. in the CCC gym. With games, food and fun, who needs big scary haunted ships. 

BEST UNDER SEVEN BET: South Peninsula Hospital’s trick or treat fun house is Friday from 2-5 p.m. is a great place for the kiddos under 7 to have a lot of fun without all that being cold, and asking strangers for candy. 

BEST BEYOND THUNDERDOME BET: Once the sugared-up gremlins crash, the adults can take themselves out. This year, Kharacters’ Halloween theme will be Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome. With Yellow Cabin and Danger Zone, the party goes from 10 p.m. to the costume contest at midnight and on until the Kharacters say go home.

BEST BE HEALTHY BET: Halloween can’t take up all your attention this week. Take a day to be healthy at the 31st annual Rotary Health Fair. The information packed event starts at 7:30 a.m. and runs until 1 p.m. in the Homer High School Commons. Pretty much everyone with an interest in health will be there with booths, presentations, demonstrations, flu shots and other great stuff to keep us going strong.

BEST DEAD DAY BET: Not to be lost in all the Halloween buzz, Dia de Los Muertos (that’s day of the dead) is best represented in the world outside of Central America by the sugar skull. Here in Homer, we have Fiesta Ritzicana at Wasabi’s. Come check it out from 6:30-10 p.m. Saturday. 

BEST CIVIC DUTY BET: All this health and festivity, don’t forget election day is this Tuesday, Nov. 4. Polls are open from 7 a.m.-8 p.m. City hall is still open from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. today, Friday and Monday for early voting. Make your voice count without losing your lunch hour to a two-hour line.