Homer Alaska - Announcements

Story last updated at 3:17 PM on Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Homer's best bets

Take any 15-minute drive around town, and you'll see unspeakable carnage. Oh, the horror, the horror, Betsteroids. Like cottonwood fluff washed into potholes, little white bunny carcasses dot our roads. OK, snowshoe hares, to be exact — road kill snacks for ravens, bald eagles, crows, coyotes, loose dogs and hungry cats. Well, maybe not cats, who have finer tastes than common animals.

Nature cruel of tire and bumper. That's how it goes. Last winter it was porcupines and this year it's snowshoe hares. For those who lost awesome raspberry patches, ornamental trees and rows of broccoli to those wascally wabbit teeth, mourn not for Little Fluffy Foo Foo. They had a good life, and should the invasion of the big ears result in the tragic demise of a few of the clan, well, tough. A raven's gotta eat, doesn't it?

Why should there be a sudden profusion of road kill rabbits? Maybe it's dark, you're driving to work on a weak latte and you just didn't see that darn hare. Maybe you did see the hare, but the road being slick and the calculus being one less hare vs. Subaru in ditch, you made the tough choice to confess to Buddha later. Maybe you're still smarting over that lost raspberry patch and remembered the Klingon proverb: "Revenge is a dessert best served cold."

Who knows? Maybe the mothership abducted the hares to do evil alien experiments, and when a hare came home, it materialized in the middle of the road just as a Ford F250 came roaring around the corner. Aliens can be mean that way. Maybe hares just don't understand internal combustion engines powering tons of steel and are too stupid to get out of the way.

But there they are, dead hares on our roads. The Betster even saw a dead hare on the beach, the poor thing, wet and big eyed and looking like a shipwrecked stuffed animal. Another seagull went home with a full belly. The cycle of nature continues. Soon we'll see well-fed lynx trotting around our hills, and perhaps next spring it will be safe to plant sugar snap peas again.

It's always time for a fun weekend, though, and between holiday parties, caroling, shopping and mourning lost snow, there's always plenty to do, like these Best Bets:

BEST BIRD IS THE WORD: Looking for a cool Homer-made craft project to give for Christmas? Check out Bunnell Street Arts Center's Birdhouse Project, running 11 a.m.-5 p.m. Monday-Friday. Decorate your own or pick up one already embellished. The project continues through Dec. 24.

BEST WORD IS THE BIRD BET: Gustavus author Hank Lentfer was just wowed by sandhill cranes when he first saw them fly overhead on his first fall in the Glacier Bay town. Hear about "Faith of Cranes," the book that came out of his love for cranes — and his daughter — at a talk at 5 p.m. Saturday at Bunnell Street Arts Center.

BEST XMAS BUCKS BET: Repurpose that old Star Trek Christmas tree ornament and get something else at the Downtown Rotary Club's Swap and Sale from 10:30 a.m.-3:30 p.m. Saturday at Paul Banks Elementary School. Bring in old decorations and gift items, get Christmas dollars and use them — or regular cash — to buy new-to-you items.

BEST JOY TO THE WORLD BET: You can't go anywhere in town without hearing Mark Robinson's Homer High School choir students. Nutcracker Faire? Yup. Share the Spirit spaghetti lunch. Uh-huh. If you missed them, though, catch some holiday music from 1-3 p.m. Sunday at the Pratt Museum for a holiday recital, when the choir sings again. The Seaside Singers and Carol Comfort's piano students also perform.

BEST APOCALYPSE TOMORROW BET: The Betster isn't quite sure if the world will end in 2012, but hey, check it out for yourself. Dax Radtke has some theories about how it's all going to come together soon, and it won't be pretty, he says. Check out his talk at 8 p.m. Tuesday at Down East Saloon.